It’s Riley’s Main Event: WWE Main Event Review for 08/21/13

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It’s Riley’s Main Event

With Riley Ross

Welcome back to It’s Riley’s Main Event where I break down each segment and match on Main Event. At the close of the review I will pick the standout moment, Superstar or Diva of the show and give a brief explanation of my choices. This week we will probably see even more fallout from the stunning revelation that the Shield is working for those dastardly McMahons. I say that is a good thing because it means the Shield isn’t going anywhere for a long time. On tonight’s lineup of matches, we have the Shield vs. Kofi Kingston and the Usos, AJ Lee takes on Naomi. The Miz and Josh Matthews are on commentary tonight and all I have to say is this: Miz keep talking about the Shield and they will hunt you down and rip you to shreds.

The Shield vs. Kofi Kingston/Usos—Kofi and Dean start off the match. Kofi tries to take him down but Dean isn’t budging. Dean takes him down and Kofi fights to his feet. They run the ropes and Kofi goes for the pin but Dean kicks out. Here comes one of the Usos to fight Dean. He goes for a pin but Dean kicks out. Dean tags in Seth Rollins. Seth kicks the Uso and here comes the other Uso. They double team Seth and prevent him from tagging in Roman or Dean. They fight it out in the corner and Seth tosses him across the ring. Uso puts Rollins in their corner and splashes him before going for a pin but Rollins kicks out. Rollins punches him and tags in Ambrose. He starts punching and stomping away at Uso. He tags back in Rollins who stretches him out. Uso starts stomping away at him and Ambrose blindly tags himself in. The Usos and Kofi take out the Shield. All three do a suicide dive and take down the three members of the Shield. Back from commercial and Kofi Kingston and Dean Ambrose are fighting it out. Kofi is dominating so far but you should never count out Ambrose. Here comes the Uso to do the ass to face smash. He goes to the ropes but Reigns distracts him. Dean dropkicks him and tags in Roman.  Roman and Seth work over the Uso. Seth comes in and slams him down. He chokes Uso and Uso goes to pull the hair. Dude, fight like a man and not a bitch. Here comes Ambrose and he does a vicious elbow drop to Uso. He delivers a series of punches before tagging in Roman Reigns. While the referee is distracted by the other Uso having a hissy fit, the Shield work over the Uso. Roman goes for the pin but Uso kicks out. Here comes Ambrose and Uso kicks him in the head. Hell to the no. I ain’t having this shit. Here comes Kofi to take out the Shield. Kofi hits Ambrose with the Boom Drop. He goes for the Trouble In Paradise but Rollins takes him down. Kofi has the Usos take out the other two and he hits the SOS on Dean and goes for the pin but Roman saves him. Seth takes out Kofi. Dean hits his Headlock Driver. Winners and still my favorites: The Shield

Everytime I see AJ skipping, I want to smack her and remind her that her ass is grown. This is the WWE not the schoolyard they picked her up from.

AJ vs. Naomi—Naomi is accompanied to the ring by Cameron, while the washed up Layla is in AJ’s corner. The match starts off with Naomi throwing an elbow before they start chain wrestling. AJ slams her down repeatedly. Naomi kicks her and goes for the pin but AJ kicks out. Naomi has her locked into a wrist hold before AJ reverses it. AJ has her from behind but Naomi starts grinding on her forcing her to break the hold. Naomi goes over the top rope but stays on the apron much to the dismay of AJ. AJ causes her to land on her knee and starts going for a submission hold. Naomi fights out. AJ kicks her and goes for the pin but Naomi kicks out. AJ hops on her back while Layla looks on. AJ breaks the hold and kicks Naomi down but Naomi knocks her down. She does the Rear View and goes for the pin but Layla gets on the apron. Cameron knocks her down. AJ goes for the Black Widow. Winner by Submission: AJ

Jack Swagger vs. Khali—I refuse to call him the Great Khali as there is nothing great about him. He is accompanied to the ring by Natalya and Hornswoggle. Swagger has Cesaro and Colter in his corner. Colter goes on a racist little rant. Colter asks Khali a question about history and his response is to bop Cesaro over the head. The match gets underway as they go for a lockup. Khali pushes him down and then punches him down. He has him in the corner and is chopping away at Swagger. Swagger goes outside the ring to confer with his cronies. He takes advantage of Khali and now that both men are in the ring. He has Khali down on the ground and is working his left ankle. Khali swats Swagger away from him and follows it up with a big boot. Swagger rolls out of the ring and pulls Khali down. When Hornswoggle grabs his ankle, Cesaro and Swagger go to attack him. Nattie smacks the taste out of Cesaro’s mouth. Swagger throws Hornswoggle into the barricade. He gets back into the ring and gets chopped down by Khali. Winner: Khali

A recap of what happened at SummerSlam and RAW is shown. For those still harping about it, you’ve been bitching that the product was stale and that Orton needed a heel turn. Sit down and shut the fuck up. If you don’t like it quit watching. Go play dolls or go play a computer game. Keep calm, let go of your expectations and enjoy the damn show.

Fandango comes out to taunt the Miz. Before the Miz can criticize the wrestler who skinned some stuffed animals, he needs to take a damn look in the mirror. Is it a jacket or a tablecloth? What happened to you Miz? Bring back the faux-hawk.

Justin Gabriel vs. Bray Wyatt—the match starts off with Bray laughing at Gabriel. Bray punches him and headbutts him. He slams him into a corner and attacks him viciously. Gabriel does kick him but he gets taken down. He drags Gabriel to the corner before charging at him. He dances with him before doing his finisher. Winner: Bray Wyatt

Moment of the Night-Natalya slapping the shit out of Cesaro. We need more Natalya.

Superstar of the Night—This honor goes to four people. The Shield for putting another amazingly awesome match. Bray Wyatt gets this honor because I honestly like his psychotic and twisted side.

In closing, I thought that it was a decent show and I look forward to watching it weekly. Make sure you all check out We’ll be airing Tuesday at 10pm ET Call in at (347) 945-6363. Have a good night and a better tomorrow!

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