Andrew B: Laying The SmackDown For 1/27/12

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Andrew B here to review another episode of Friday Night SmackDown as this week Daniel Bryan will still be a cocky champion and Teddy Long will have pointless backstage segments.. You know that WWE show that used to have lengthy matches but now ever match is less than ten minutes that show. On this episode we have the In Ring Debut of Aksana plus a rematch from Survivor Series as Big Show battles Mark Henry. Also this week we will see the debut of the future of tag teams as Santoshi debuts as a team but more on that later. Let’s start now before I get fired like Drew McIntyre.

We begin with a look back at the attack by Big Show when he accidently almost killed AJ who was her boyfriend’s match two weeks ago.

Big Show makes his way to the ring to address the fans to start the show. Show starts off by saying he is sorry. Show says that he already told AJ but he wants to tell everyone else that he is sorry and that he apologized and AJ forgave him immediately. Show wants everyone else to do the same. Show says that he is having trouble forgiving himself. The collision was not an isolated incident. When he was young, he didn’t know his own strength. He always ended up hurting other kids when he was younger. When he came to the WWE, he thought all of that was behind him. He thought that being a freak and things not being his fault would go away when he came to the WWE. Show says that he loves what he does. Show says that he has been here for thirteen years and he loves his job. After what happened to AJ, he says that he doesn’t have the heart to go on with his career. Show says that he is very honored and proud to be in the Triple Threat Match on Sunday, but after Sunday he is going to have to do some soul searching. Daniel Bryan’s music interrupts Show and Daniel makes his way to the ring. Bryan says that everything is okay because Show is sorry. Bryan tells Show that he put a 95 pound woman in the hospital. Show says that it was an accident. Bryan says that AJ may have accepted the apology, but she was heavily medicated and does not even remember the visit. Bryan says that he remembers because he remembers everything. Bryan says that he always thought that the WWE was a place for athletes, not genetic freaks. Bryan tells Show not to mention Andre because Show is no Andre the Giant.
Bryan tells everyone that Show has them fooled and that it is empty talk just like all of the apologies. If Show was really repentant, he would not be apologizing to AJ, him, or the people. Show would do the honorable thing and retire right now. Bryan pokes the giant and he tells him to do the right thing and leave. Bryan slaps Show in the face and Show looks like he wants to pull of Bryan’s head. Bryan slaps Show again and Show grabs Bryan by the throat and he backs him into the corner. Show tells Bryan that what happened to AJ was an accident. He calls Bryan an ass and then he tells Bryan that what happens on Sunday will not be.

Mark Henry’s music plays and he makes his way to the ring. Henry says that he was compelled to come out and remind Bryan and Show that it is a Triple Threat Steel Cage Match on Sunday. Henry says that he doesn’t care about Show’s hurt feelings or about Bryan’s Napoleon Complex. He says he sure doesn’t care about some 95 pound girl in a training bra. Henry says that Show knows what he is capable of so he doesn’t have to sweet talk him. Henry tells Bryan to get in his face if he wants to talk to him. Henry tells Bryan that after weaseling out of the title match last week, he is going to rip off his skin on principle but Bryan blames the lumberjacks for what happened. Before Mark can do anything, Teddy Long comes out and says that Wade Barrett is going to face Randy Orton tonight in a main event; we might as well have another main event. Since Daniel Bryan faced the Big Show two weeks ago and he faced Mark Henry last week, so it is only fair that Mark Henry faces the Big Show tonight as we go to break.

Back from break & we go to the Goldman Box where Cody says that through the kindness of his heart, he is giving the Wish Troll meets Jap-Anime reject a non-title match. He says that Justin can tell his grandkids that he lost to the man who won the Royal Rumble Match.

Match 1: Cody Rhodes vs. Justin Gabriel in a Non-Title Match:
The match starts off with fast action that is back and forth and Gabriel takes control as Rhodes rolls to the floor and Gabriel hits a corkscrew flip and then sends Rhodes back into the ring. Gabriel with a springboard cross body and Rhodes rolls through and gets a near fall. Gabriel with an STO and then he tries for the springboard moonsault but Rhodes moves. Gabriel lands on his feet though but Rhodes with Beautiful Disaster followed by Cross Rhodes for the win after about 3 minutes.
Winner: Cody Rhodes

Match Rating: ** out of 5

Santino is talking to Teddy in the office and he says that he has the perfect match. He says that it is an Extreme Loser Leaves Town Match where the loser has to join a group of monkeys, go into a spaceship and leave the planet Earth. Teddy says that he isn’t going to do that. Yoshi walks in and he says that it is out of the world. Santino says that he wants to introduce Teddy to the next Tag Team Champions, Santoshi but Yoshi says they are Yoshitino. They argue for a while until Drew McIntyre enters the office. Teddy says that Drew’s career has been on thin ice. Teddy points out that Drew said that he would be able to beat Santino in a blindfold match, but he couldn’t even win after cheating. Drew tells Teddy that Babe Ruth struck out five times in a game. Teddy tells Drew that he might have struck out, but more often than not, Babe knocked it out of the park. Teddy tells Drew that he will have to knock it out of the park against Sheamus tonight. Drew thanks Teddy for the opportunity and then Teddy tells Drew to batter up because his match is next as we go to break.

Match 2: Drew McIntyre vs. “Great White” Sheamus:
Sheamus blocks a punch and Sheamus with punches. Drew fights back with a kick and a few punches. Sheamus blocks a hip toss and Sheamus with a short arm clothesline for a near fall. Sheamus sends Drew into the turnbuckles and Irish whips him. Drew with a kick but Sheamus with the rolling fireman’s carry slam and gets a near fall. Drew goes to the apron and Sheamus grabs him and Drew drops Sheamus on the top rope. Drew connects with a drop kick to Sheamus and takes control until Sheamus hits with a series of forearms to the back followed by a short arm clothesline and a few double sledges. Sheamus with a power slam. Drew with a punch to the head but Sheamus hits the Brogue Kick for the three win.
Winner: Sheamus
Match Rating: * ½ out of 5

We then get the Royal Rumble by the Numbers video package followed by highlights on the Tornado tag match from last week. We have the WWE Rewind: Last week’s Texas Tornado Tag Match between the Usos and the tag champions. Rosa Mendes is in the Goldman Box & says two months ago, nobody knew Epico and Primo, but now they are tag team champions.

Match 3: Santoshi vs. Epico and Primo with Rosa Mendes in a Non-Title Match
Santino and Yoshi bow with no end in sight. Santino and Primo start things off and Santino with a hip lock take down and then he floats over and then does the trombone after celebrating his achievement. Santino with a drop toe hold to Primo and tags in Yoshi as they hit a double sledge and then Tatsu chops Primo. Primo kicks Yoshi and Epico makes the blind tag. Yoshi chops Primo and Epico hits him from behind & connects with a butterfly suplex and he gets a near fall. Epico with a rear chin lock but Yoshi fights out and rolls him up with a backslide for a near fall. Santino tags in and he punches Epico and does a split followed by a hip toss and a diving head butt for a near fall but Primo breaks up the cover. Primo clotheslines Yoshi over the top rope to the floor. Primo turns around and gets hit with the Cobra but Epico is the legal man in the match and he hits his finisher to get his team the win after 3 minutes.
Winners: Epico and Primo

Match Rating: * out of 5

Backstage Daniel Bryan approaches Mark Henry to try and convince him to take the Big Show out so that this Sunday’s Cage match will be down to just Bryan and Henry.

Back from break & Wade Barrett comes to the ring. Wade asks for some decorum in the building. He says that there is a lot of pageantry and emotion attached to tonight’s SmackDown. It must be due to the return of the Viper. Wade says that he has it on authority that Orton is letting his ego get the best of him. He might be physically ready to go, but he is broken spiritually. Barrett says that it looked like Orton had fallen and he couldn’t get up. That is why Orton is a shell of a man. The voices in Orton’s head are telling him that Barrett is a vicious competitor. Randy Orton’s music plays and he is walking through the back. Orton comes out & they fight in the ramp and then Orton with a clothesline when they enter the ring. Orton levels Barrett in the corner with punches and officials come to the ring to break it. Barrett gets out of the ring but Orton catches up to Barrett and hits him from behind. Orton sends Barrett into the apron and he punches him. Teddy Long appears on the stage and he half-heartedly waves some wrestlers to come out to restore some order. Curt Hawkins, Trent Barreta, and Tyler Reks make their way to the ring and they do about as well as the referees. Barrett punches Orton while they hold him. Barrett gets into the ring and Orton follows after him and he spears Barrett. People come into the ring to break things up and Barrett escapes. Orton is held off by Reks, Hawkins, Barreta, and the Usos. Orton thanks them for being peacekeepers but then Randy hits the RKO on Reks, Barreta, Hawkins & the Usos as we go to break.
Back from break and we get a Royal Rumble Flashback to 2006 when Rey Mysterio set the record for longest time in the Rumble match.

Daniel Bryan is in the back with Kaitlyn and he tells her that she needs to do a favor for AJ since they are best friends. Bryan tells Kaitlyn to tell Show that Mark Henry is going to try to injure him tonight in the match to keep Show out of the match at the Royal Rumble. Kaitlyn wants to know if she is doing AJ or Daniel a favor. Bryan points out that AJ loves him & Kaitlyn agrees but she wants Daniel to tell her how he really feels about AJ. Bryan says that he is a private person and that she needs to talk to Show as soon as possible.

We see footage from last week’s Flag Match between Ted Dibiase and Hunico.

Match 4: Hunico with Camacho vs. Ted Dibiase
DiBiase’s left wrist is heavily taped as he apparently suffered a cracked bone and some torn cartilage at a house show last week. Hunico goes right for the wrist obviously, tearing away at it with a nasty arm bar. Dibiase tries to go for Dream Street but he can’t do it because of the injury. Hunico finishes him off with a twisting fireman’s carry slam for the win in less than a minute.
Winner: Hunico
Match Rating: ¼ * out of 5

After the match, Hunico & Camacho attack Ted. Camacho with forearms to the back and Ted writhes in pain against the ringside barrier. Camacho holds Ted’s arm while Hunico stomps on the broken wrist.

We go to the back where Aksana’s music is playing in Teddy’s office. Teddy excuses himself to do something and Natalya storms in and forces normal lighting in the office. Natalya wants a rematch against Tamina. Aksana says that she saw Tamina squash Natalya like grape a few weeks ago. Natalya says that she will beat that whack job and then she will take care of Aksana. Aksana tell Natalya that what she does with Teddy in private but Teddy & tells Aksana since she wants to compete, she will face Natalya. Natalya tells Aksana that she cannot wait to make Aksana cry. There is a fart noise in the office and Natalya runs away. Teddy says that he needs to check on Ted Dibiase and Aksana leaves with Teddy. Santino enters and he smells something bad and starts choking as we go to break.

We are back and Alex Riley is in the ring and we get a replay of Regal dancing last week.

Match 5: Alex Riley vs. Brodus Clay:
Alex wants to show his dance moves and Brodus does the Shimmy before hitting an Exploder suplex and then Brodus with a splash into the corner and then he hits the cross body for the win.
Winner: Brodus Clay

Match Rating: ½ * out of 5

Then Brodus and the ladies dance in the ring. We then go backstage as Kaitlyn is talking to Big Show as we go to break. Back from break and we get highlight of Ryder vs. Kane from Raw.

Match 6: Aksana vs. Natalya:
Natalya looks for Tamina and Aksana with a rollup for the win in under 12 seconds.

Winner: Aksana

Match Rating: NR

After the match, Natalya attacks Aksana from behind and she puts Aksana in the Sharpshooter and Aksana taps out. Tamina comes to the ring and she hits a Samoan drop and then Tamina goes up top for the Super fly Splash as we go to break.

Main Event: “The World’s Largest Athlete” Big Show vs. Mark Henry:
Before the match starts, Daniel Bryan makes his way to ringside to watch the match. Show with a kick and forearms followed by a head butt and Henry goes to the floor. Show goes after Henry and he kicks and punches Henry. Show puts Henry back into the ring and he connects with a head butt. Show with chops to Henry but he fights back with punches and Henry lands awkwardly and the referee checks on him as he rolls to the outside & we go to break. We are back and Big Show won by count out but Daniel Bryan enters the ring. Bryan hits Show with the chair & gets his title belt and Show goes after him with the chair. Bryan back pedals and then he tosses the belt to Show and hits a drop kick. Bryan hits Show with the chair and then he chokes Show with the chair. Bryan continues to attack Show’s leg with the chair. They go back into the ring and Bryan applies the LeBell Lock. Show powers out of the hold and Show choke slams Bryan and he gets ready to knock out Bryan but Daniel gets out of the ring and crawls up the ramp to safely to end the show.

Winner: Big Show by Count Out

Match Rating: NR

Overall:

I do not know what happened to SmackDown as it used to be a solid wrestling show. The match of the night was Rhodes vs. Gabriel but it is a shame that ever match was under 5 minutes. The opening promo was good and the best part of the show. Brodus Clay vs. Riley was enjoyable but a squash. Also I hope Ted Dibiase gets better soon as he is really injured as is Henry from the main event which I hope he rests and can compete at WrestleMania, which goes for both men. Orton’s return was exciting but I do not know how long his current feud with Barrett will continue on for but if I was WWE I would have Orton return The tag match was bad and it just goes to show that WWE has to put two jobbers together to make a team for the champions but how about push the Usos. Also next week can Natalya & Drew McIntyre get wins next week as both are wasted talents right now and don’t get me started on that fart thing with Natalya this week. The last thing for this week is the rating and this week the show earned 3 out of 10.

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About John Mayer

31 year old wrestling fan and writer
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